“Mazal Tov!” Mazal Tov means that everything you do, from now on, should be at the right moment in the right place. Imagine if Rothschild told me, I’m ready to give you two million dollars. I go to his office, and they tell me he just left this morning for Hong Kong. Gevalt! I don’t have mazal, right? Because mazal means that everything is at the right moment.
“Yaleh v’yitsmach kegan ratov” [It should rise and grow like a watered garden]. Getting married is like planting a tree. You have to water it all the time. Sometimes you meet people who are married, but it’s a dried out marriage. So “Yaleh v’yitsmach,” everything should grow “kegan ratov” like a garden that is mamash watered.
“V’yafek ratson m’HaShem ha’tov” [And he’ll receive what he needs from HaShem who is good]. Until a person gets married, he’s a little bit angry at Gd. Because it’s not fair. I have a soulmate somewhere. So where is she/he? Therefore until we meet our soulmate, we’re a little bit angry at Gd. When you meet your soulmate, you say, “Oh, Gd is so good.” “V’yafek ratson m’HaShem ha’tov,” “Master of the World, thank You so much.” It has to do with the right moment. Gd says, “I know where he/she is, it wasn’t the right time yet.”
The Rizhiner said, not only do they call out in Heaven whom you should marry, but they even call out the moment and the place and they also call out all the wedding guests. Unbelievable.
“Matsa isha matsah tov” [A person who finds a wife, finds good]. Why do people after they get married become a little bit more frum [religious] than before? Because they realize, the first mitzva is to get married and have children, and then they say to each other, the first mitzva is so beautiful. Maybe all the other mitzvos are also so beautiful!
“V’al yavrichu v’al ya’alimu, lo zeh mizeh…” [You swear to each other, you’ll never run away from each other and you’ll never ignore each other]. Running away is one thing, but ignoring is so, so bad. When you run away, that means, you exist, but I’m running away from you. To ignore means, you don’t exist in my book. Gevalt does that hurt. The tenaim is not only between a bride and groom. It’s also between us and Gd. Sometimes is looks like Gd is running away from us. But the saddest thing in the world is when Gd is ignoring us. There should never again be a period when Yidden [Jews] think, Gd forbid, Gd is ignoring us.
Shalom and shalva. Shalom means peaceful. Do you know what shalva means? Imagine if every five minutes you had to say, “I hope he’s not exploding five minutes from now.” Shalom means peace, shalva means tranquility. I don’t have to worry.
“K’derech b’nai Torah” [like the way of a Torah scholar]. Ben Torah means that after you are married you don’t have to worry about your marriage anymore. Sadly enough, in the world, there is not this safety today. One day he might come home and say, “I went through changes, I love somebody else.” Hopefully, by b’nei Torah, the commitment is so much deeper. A ben Torah is someone who is mamash committed to Yiddishkeit [Judaism] forever and ever and ever and ever and ever.
You know what “kabbolas kinyan” is all about? You can live, hopefully for a hundred years, with your soulmate. But the deepest question is, where does it touch you? How much does it mean to you?